Press SELECT to view system stats. Currently analyzing legacy drivers...
HARDWARE RESTORATION
Gentoo Compiles
Ubuntu Tweaks
OS/2 Recovery
Windows Distro
"I'd rather debug a 386 than watch a progress bar. You bring the fried motherboard, I bring the soldering iron and existential dread."
TECH NOLOGY SUPPORT
Patience
Troubleshooting
BBS Era
Cloud Reliance
"Your router isn't 'broken', it's just confused like the rest of us. Let's reset the DHCP lease and move forward."
SYSTEMS ARCHITECT
Kernel Panic Res
Command Line
Mouse Usage
Anti-Micro$oft
"GUIs are nice, but have you ever felt the pure, unadulterated joy of a perfectly optimized init script? Didn't think so."